بِسْمِ اللّهِ الرَّحْمـَنِ الرَّحِيم
(In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful)
زُيّنَ لِلنَّاسِ حُبُّ الشَّهَوتِ مِنَ النّسَآء وَالْبَنِينَ وَالْقَنَـطِيرِ الْمُقَنطَرَةِ مِنَ الذَّهَبِ وَالْفِضَّةِ وَالْخَيْلِ الْمُسَوَّمَةِ وَالانْعَـمِ وَالْحَرْثِ ذلِكَ مَتَـعُ الْحَيَوةِ الدُّنْيَا وَاللَّهُ عِندَهُ حُسْنُ الْمَأَبِ
“ Beautified for men is the love of things they covet; women, children, Qanatir Al-Muqantarah of gold and silver, branded beautiful horses (Musawwamah), cattle and fertile land. This is the pleasure of the present world’s life; but Allah has the excellent return with Him” [3:14] (Tafir Ibn Kathir)
Sarah: (Exited)Alham du lillah, we’re almost approaching our next month Rabīʿ ath-
Hajar: Really…, but hey, we are just into February, Its Valentines (giggling), it’s the month
AAhhh, does this ring a bell in our ears?
All most every other morning just before leaving to college/work don’t we hear our parents say- “Allah only knows what’s happening to this world, it’s growing worse day by day”, “We need to protect our children from the Fitnah (test/trials) outside”, “Allah save them when they go to college”,”be careful, there are a bunch of bad people out there”, Well at least I heard this every single day from my dad, no kidding. *laughs, more laughs*. May Allah bless and protect my Dad from fitnah.
What Fitnah are our parents talking about- The fitnah outside, within our own selves, things given to us as a blessing or the evil things?
Desires keep growing over time and they never seem to diminish unless we train our conscience.Well, if we as parents understand the prime importance and impact of religious education on ourselves and our kids at a very early stage, then at least we would be equipped to tackle the soo called fitnah and desires. In addition to Islamic education in schools, the mother’s lap is the best of all madresas(school).Home and family are the epitome wherein the disguise of everything is disclothed, says my teacher.
In the above ayah, it’s amazing Allah addresses the entire mankind ( لِلنَّاسِ ) and not just the believer’s. Man across different generations, cultures, countries, nationality, color, country, race, era has this immense desire for women, children, the hoarding of treasure (Qanatir Al-Muqantarah) of gold and silver, branded horses, wealth of cattle and plantations.
All human beings have been born with desires but the most transcendent is the desire for women, which is also the most difficult test for men. It precedes the desire for all other things.Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5096; Muslim, 2740.recorded that the Messenger said,
«مَا تَرَكْتُ بَعْدِي فِتْنَةً أَضَرَّ عَلَى الرِّجَالِ مِنَ النِّسَاء»
I did not leave behind me a test more tempting to men than women
Hubbush Shahwaat /Love (for the) worldly desires
The word الشَّهَوتِ means to desire or long for. This longing maybe for a person, an object or anything wherein the soul naturally inclines towards it and finds pleasure in it. We blame our desires as the cause of all our sins and hellfire a punishment to those sins.
So, does it mean to desire or love anything is wrong? NO, absolutely not. Allah never asked us to abandon our duniya (world).
It is Allah who created these desires in humans, all one needs is to follow a legitimate path to fulfill it. Subhan Allah desires are a blessing for all of us. If it were not the desire of Jannah, the desire to drink the water from Salsabeel or al-Kawthar from Prophet’s hand, the desire to meet our Rabb (Lord), we would be restricted in performing our duties to meet our creator.
Had there been no desire, there would have been no paradise.
Types of Desires
- Shahwaat Sadikha – Natural Desires – It is permissible to fulfill them through Halaal/Lawful means. eg. One is allowed to eat while he is not fasting, sexual desire can be fulfilled through marriage.
“But as for him who feared standing before his Lord, and forbade himself from desire. Verily, Paradise will be his abode.”[79:40-41]
Shahwaat Kadhiba – These are desires that need to be supressed and one should not be obsessive in fulfilling them. This leads to disobedience to Allah.
Islaam does not permit temporary marriage (mut’at), prostitution ( bighaa), adultery between consenting adults( zina) and marriage with the hidden intention to divorce after a time.
“But if they answer you not, then know that they only follow their own lusts. And who is more astray than one who follows his own lusts, without guidance from Allah Verily, Allah guides not the people who are wrongdoers” [28:50]
“And she, in whose house he was, sought to seduce him (to do an evil act), and she closed the doors and said: “Come on, O you.” He said: “I seek refuge in Allah! Truly, he is my Rabb! He made my living in a great comfort! Verily, the wrongdoers will never be successful” [12:23]
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 4832, Narrated by Abu Hurayrah, Allah’s Messenger(Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam)said, “Do you know the things which most commonly brings people into Paradise? It is fear of Allah and good character. Do you know what most commonly brings people into Hell? It is the two hollow things: the mouth and the private parts.”
A stance of honour could give us ETERNAL BLISS.
Walking through the storms of desires – a spiritual murder
When we madly desire the latest models of the fast zooming cars – Ferrari, Lamborghini or simply adore and ape the latest actors or are head over heels with our prince charming (or dainty damsel) is it because the car or the actors love you? One really bad argument with your prince/damsel and you’ll find your head held high.
This one longing- almost as deep, almost as imperious, as the desire for food or sleep is the “desire to be great”, “the craving to be appreciated”, ”the lust to satisfy ones-self” that lures many a soul. This gnawing and unfaltering human hunger in pursuit of the opposite sex, in feeding one’s desire is what makes a person walk from small sins towards the Fahishah(indecency).
Allah says in the Qur’an “do not go even near to” fornication he does not say “do not commit it” because a series of small acts will eventually lead to the act itself.
وَلاَ تَقْرَبُواْ الزِّنَى إِنَّهُ كَانَ فَاحِشَةً وَسَآءَ سَبِيلا
“And come not near to unlawful sex. Verily, it is Fahishah (immoral sin) and an evil way”[17:32]
This headlong pursuit of physical pleasure, outside the Islamic ethic, leaves one dashing farther and farther away from the unique comfort and tranquility that Allah has put through our spouses.
There are certain things that in themselves are neither wrong nor Haram(unlawful) but if you get involved with them, then slowly but surely one will eventually be sucked in its vicious cycle, ending up in Haram. By engaging ourselves in a series of steps towards petty acts of disobedience we are making a pathway (سَبِيلا) for Shaitan till eventually he has such control over us that we succumb to him totally.
E.g.. It’s starts with intermingling of sexes (it’s just Dawah program Mom), a handshake with the opposite sex and there continues the story…….
End result: we are veiling our hearts to the commands of Allah thereby not considering a shameful act as shameful anymore and this frantic approach grinds the act of Shahwaat into the dirt.
And the answer is ……. Allah doesn’t call the qualified He qualifies the called
“I respond to the invocations of the supplicant when he calls on Me” [2:186]
- By not obeying the commands of Allah we are denying them. So don’t see how small the sin you are doing is, but see who you are doing it against?
- Start off by reviving your conscience by making the niyah to have dignity and respect, for ourselves and others-let’s get close to our fitrah(inborn natural predisposition).
Baihaqi reported on the authority of Salman Al-Farsi (Radhiallaho Anho) that Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) mentioned in his sermon in Ramadhan “O people! You have made your conscience the slave of your desires. Make it free by invoking Allah for forgiveness”
- Since every action has a ripple effect, let’s make no delay in creating a ripple effect of sincere tauba (repentance) and forgiveness.
Allah says to the Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam)in the Holy Quran, Say: “O my servants who have transgressed against themselves! Despair not of the mercy of Allah, verily, Allah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. And turn in repentance (and in obedience with true faith) to your Lord and submit to Him before the torment comes upon you, (and) then you will not be helped.”[39:53-54]
- Seek Allah’s sincere help, he will definitely respond to your call.
“You (alone) we worship, and You (alone) we ask for help” [1:4]
- Friends influence, help and motivate a person. Make friends with the Sauliheen (righteous).A peot once said “I love the righteous people although I am not one of them, perhaps Allah will also give me some righteousness”. A person unconsciously learns from the company he is in.
- Lower your gaze, fast more often, if it still doesn’t work, get married – at least one will be saved from indulging in unlawful acts, thereby calling the wrath of Allah.Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 7.4, Narrated by Abdullah-We were with the Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) while we were young and had no wealth whatever. So Allah’s Messenger (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) said, “O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty, and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power.”
- Make a promise, a solemn covenant with Allah never to repeat the sin again.
Sexual attractiveness is a continuous process that is necessary to bind the two people together but it involves social and psychological bonding. It requires a bonding to the commands of Allah by preserving one’s chastity.Prophet (Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) said,
«الدُّنْيَا مَتَاعٌ، وَخَيْرُ مَتَاعِهَا الْمَرْأَةُ الصَّالِحَة»
This life is a delight, and the best of its delight is a righteous wife
A’ishah, May Allah be pleased with her, said, “Nothing was more beloved to the Messenger of Allah than women, except horses,” and in another narration, “…than horses except women.”
Desires should be fulfilled by lawful means, in moderation and as a Mataah( temperory benefit) for our sustenance in the worldly life which will help us reap reward in the hereafter. Through them one can benefit and serve the Deen(Religion) in innumerable ways.
Conclusion-Take time to ponder and reflect over the book of Allah
Dear friends, I am not trying to ram my opinion down your throats, but just suggest that one has more faith in ideas that you discover for yourself than ideas handed to you in a silver plate. These are ayahs taken out from the Qur’an and a few Hadith, so after reading this let’s just sit down and analyse ourselves, our shortcomings, our desires and reflect on ways we could spiritually revive ourself with the Qur’an by ourself.In sha Allah.
Irrespective of what religion or back ground we come from, one needs to adhere to some codes of conduct. The fitrah (inborn natural predisposition) within a person demands that he operates by an ethical system of some sort.
Duwa of Omar (Radhiallaho Anho), my favourite khalifa , mentioned in Fathul Bari is worth mentioning, “O Allah we cannot help but be happy with those things in which you have placed an attraction for us. I ask you that I should spend these in the way that they should be spent”
Another Duwa from Omar (Radhiallaho Anho), “We cannot help but love that which you have adorned for us, so save me from the evil aspects of these things and give me taufeekh that I use them for your sake”
May Allah have mercy upon us, guide us to fear Him and protect our chastity and our modesty. Ameen.